i always vow to change my lifestyle in some way or other, whether by studying more to get better grades or to socialize more with my peers, but it never works out the way i want it to. i can never find a good balance of both, which is frustrating because i feel like whenever i do one thing, i have to give the other one up. i know it shouldn’t be this way but that’s definitely what it turns out to be in my life. i think that relates a lot to my personality too, where i often put too much heart and too much effort into one aspect of something but lose sight and momentum on other aspects. i wish i were able to train myself to multi-task more efficiently and to actually stick to the goals i set or the changes i want to make. but it’s easy to say all this and not actually go and DO it so i guess i just have to push myself even harder and give myself more drive to achieve these goals to change and constantly tell myself that i cannot give up. i cannot give up. i cannot give up. i cannot give up.